It’s nearing the end of September, and here I’d like to write something. A post that maybe a sum of what has happened in my daily life, or just a post to say hello to anyone who came across my blog.
In the beginning of 2017, I remember that I’ve said to myself that I’m going to join Nanowrimo this year. Like, for real. I really want to test myself by working hard and earning a piece or some stories. But that ‘want’, ended up only as a bubble of thought. Puff, it’s gone when it can not win the struggle I’ve faced in real life. In my defense, the reason is that I don’t have much time. It has been long since I have a good time in reading, and even longer since I could write anything on this blog.
See, I only pitied myself.
I don’t know, but these days I was so easily getting distracted. And the distractions keep blinding me from doing things right. I have so much ideas in my mind. To do this, or start to do that. Planning this kind of habit, starting to read more, clearing up my head and get focus. Oh boy, it looks perfect in my mind. But why can’t I translate it into actions?
Who to blame? What to blame? When can I be a real grown up person if I keep getting hit in this kind of trial?
And then I thought, maybe the problem is: I am the one who shut my eyes, I am the one who avoid the real thing, I am the one who keep running from the important things. A coward, I am.
It is hard to keep getting backward and start all over again, but it’s on me, right? I mean I have to get through this kind of trial (literally) until my time in this world is over and I go back to my Creator.
Brace yourself, nafs! You’ll get stronger, only if you keep fighting!